Trusting yourself when you’re a zebra

Learning to trust yourself and others when you’re gifted.

Why are overcoming fear and self-confidence so important when you’re a zebra?

I went on a tour of New Zealand in a van, and during this period, I had put Follow the Zebra on hold for a while.

People often ask me why and how I managed to leave everything behind overnight? The answer is simple: I promised myself, ever since I was a child, never to let my fears guide me. It’s fear that paralyzes us and prevents us from making the right choices.

I think this lucidity and maturity comes from the fact that I’m gifted. I’m an atypical person, making choices that sometimes seem incomprehensible to those around me. But for me, it’s a no-brainer! It’s as clear as day.

Since my diagnosis I’ve realized that I’ve always been a precocious child and an atypical adult. As if, in the end, I was never in the right timing, never as I was expected to be. from a very young age, my reactions, my emotions, my vision, I was out of step. I did the chameleon, carapace, false self and invisibility cloak.

But our emotions and atypical personality soon give us away! Since childhood, I’ve had a relatively assertive personality, but it was in my teens that I decided to stop being afraid and assume my slightly offbeat side.

Gifted, zebras, how do you get out of your comfort zone to regain your confidence?

I left everything behind and went to live abroad for 8 months!

Having an unlimited wifi connection and a plug, I took the opportunity to check out the blog’s stats. Here’s a surprise: over the last 7 days alone, more than 2,000 of you have read my articles… (crazy!!!) and more than 400 of you are following me on the Suivez le Zèbre Facebook page.

By the way, if you’re looking for a bit of a change of scenery and nature, feel free to subscribe to the page or on Instagram to see photos from my trip. 😊

In particular, I’ve shared photos of the day that was the highlight of my trip! We saw whales, sea lions, a school of over 200 dolphins, albatrosses… in the wild, of course.

Trusting yourself means making the right decisions for yourself.

Leaving everything when there was nothing to leave!

As you know, I was diagnosed as gifted, high-potential, zebra, whatever you want to call it, a year ago! I’ve always been considered a hothead… Someone who listened to nothing and did as he pleased.

Today, I know that this isn’t actually true, it’s just that I think I’m less subject to unconscious fears than most people…

Of course, when the opportunity presented itself, I said to myself, um, you’ve got buddies you love, your family’s here, you live in a region where you feel too good, you’ve got an apartment you love, a job you love, a car you love and above all, you’ve got Léon !!!! My little French boubou… that I love to bits.

So, the pluses for leaving everything, there was only one in fact, and that was #J, my beautiful better half, whom I’d met a few months earlier.

For most people, the conclusion of ok, I leave everything and I go, was, Mél, this real artichoke heart!!!!
But not at all!!! The majority of people just don’t think like me/us?

When you’re a zebra, trusting yourself means accepting your ability to make important decisions very quickly.

A well-thought-out trip…in just a few hours! 😀

I think it’s funny when people say to me, it’s beautiful to have left everything for love!
Yes it’s true I left everything because #J was leaving en New Zealand, but if she’d gone to China or Mali, I wouldn’t have followed her. She knows it. Because I couldn’t see myself living in Mali where it’s 2000 degrees half the year and there are no mountains… As for China, there’s far too much of the world!

As if I were completely scatterbrained ^^. But no, even if I’m a bulldozer zebra, I think before I act, even if it’s not easy for those around me!

So I left, but I left because New Zealand was a country I wanted to visit, so I left for me, not for her! And then I quickly calculated the risk… This is my strength, as I’ve already explained in another article.

Being a zebra means I can analyze all the data in a situation very quickly. I didn’t need to think for 6 months: I’m leaving / I’m not leaving. Within hours, the decision was made.

So for most people, this trip may seem like a whim, but for me it was well thought out…in just a few hours!

And if things didn’t work out between us, I could go home at any time, or stay and make my trip alone… In the end, it worked, and we had a magical year, which we’ll always remember fondly.

Why do I have no regrets about leaving everything behind to go on this trip?

On a trip you win everything, because the people I left behind in January are waiting for me when I get back in September . And I HATE TO SEE YOU ALL AGAIN!!!!

This trip was also another step in the quest for “who am I”? initiated a few years ago…

Someone who likes to go on adventures but likes to come home! And home is Léon, friends, family, colleagues, France and its French grumblers! My Savoie, its lake and mountains!

Sometimes you have to leave to make sure you want to come back!

I’d definitely advise everyone to go and discover the magnificent country of New Zealand. The fact that it’s so far from home makes the adventure even more intense! And it’s all so easy here…

I also realized when I came here that France is one of the most beautiful countries in the world, and that being born French is a real blessing!

Accepting mistakes when you’re a zebra is a real challenge!

Make the mistake of thinking that happiness lies elsewhere, to understand that happiness is already here…
I’m often told that I‘m lucky. If I’m honest, luck has nothing to do with it.

I just try not to be afraid to live, not to put any limits on myself!

People are often afraid of what might happen tomorrow, and therefore prevent themselves from living today! I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow… so I’ve just decided to live now.

I left a permanent job, sold my car and left my apartment. I arrived here. I got a job, bought a car and found a house. Then I quit my job here and left the house to live in the car.
Today I sold the car.

When I get back to France, I’m going to find a flat (that is, if some kind soul rents me a flat, even though I don’t have a permanent contract, yes, I didn’t miss that ^^), a car and a job…

I might have been afraid to leave my stable, pleasant life… Because in France, we’re told that it’s hard to have a job, and a cool job that you love and get paid what you’re worth. So when you’ve got one, you’ve got to keep it, otherwise…

Or else what?

Take care of yourself!
Do what you feel is right for you!!! Not what society or your family or your loved ones or your employer want you to be.

You can also find more information, resources and tools on Giftedness in Mel POINAS‘ book. With a lot of humor, Mel tells the story of the discovery of her giftedness and the routines she put in place to finally find her place!

To go further, you can read

• Gifted, High Potential, learning to let go
• Reflections on tolerance and intolerance among the gifted
• Can you be a happy gifted adult?
• What is impostor syndrome?
• The best books about High Learning Potential

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